Yes, this I can admit. That although many things harmful I’ve abandoned I can still be toxic. Be judge mental and harshly pious like the vipers of the temple Jesus spoke of. I have thoughts I shouldn’t have…urges towards moral wildness I should be way past. Violence stemming from an old arrogance in me that refuses to stay buried in me. All this chaos behind a face with kind eyes and an inviting smile. If I didn’t fear Allah I’d be under a headstone right now.. awaiting the resurrection… no, for a warrior even after old wounds heal new ones appear… so pain truly never goes away…this is the nature of life for those on the battle field…